don't fuck up, just fuck, WeiblichZuletzt gesehen: gestern Nachmittag

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hi, I'm myself. and I may be 13, and 16, and 18 and 69
whatever works.

i love the world, except for the moments when i hate it so fucking much
i narcisstically love myself, except for the moments when i despise myself
i love rainbows, berries, unicorns and your bloody brains scattered all over my pony-painted walls
i do adore progressive rock, 60s, sung poetry, rapped pieces, lady gaga, rave shit, everything silly and epic serious, greatest voices of all time
and those guys fucking up every single note busking on railway stations.
which basically means everyone who can pull off a good show.

i may fuck you for a year and ask for your name after but i also may never see you and remember every blink of your imaginary eye
i may run around the streets pretending to be mentally ill and you'll problably be sure i'm not pretending
i may sing on the top of my lungs in the bus and keep completely silent around you
i may tell my life story to the random stranger waiting for the same bus and be afraid to tell you a single word
i may be a plastic pink blonde one day and frilly lace dark goth queen the other
i may laugh and cry in the same second and forget about it in the following one
i'm way too intelligent not to be super dumb.

and i'll still be the same myself

i wear super mini skirts in winter and then cry about being sick
i drink hard and do dumbest things in the world
and i do then again
i beg for quiet life in noisy moments, and i beg for crazy life in peaceful ones
i'm never content and always frustrated
the more i love you, the harder i offend you
i may be really hard to be around
but people sometimes think it's cool 'cause i'm so good at making an impression of the retarted ten year old

i never say 'i never' 'cause it stopped making sense few centuries ago
but i'm still a huge hypocrite. we all are, not that this makes any kind of good excuse

i'm fucked up. but that's just how the things work, right?

god, it's been a lovely day!