Montag, 3. Dez 2007, 13:58

Alrighty, I read about this somewhere else, and I find the thought of it quite charming, though I don't really like to flame & hate around (yeah… right).

So enjoy my vengeful ramblings against the most-loved artists (according to my scrobblings) of mine.

Explanation of the so-called Scrobblo-statistical-error (SSE later on):
My playlist is biased in some ways, since I got discographies of some well renown bands, whom I seldom really listen to, they just pop up because there are 100-200 songs of them instead of the normal 20-50-ish songs of other bands- when shuffled for a longer period, this can alter the statistics by benefitting those bands. So whenever the suffix (SSE) is used later on it means this band would normally not be this high in my charts.

For the slackers that feel easily offended- remember that this is in fact my own music taste I'm ripping on right now.

~~~~

20- Samsas Traum
They have a lot of great songs, but I hate this diva-like bitch-frontman, who can't really come up with one brand of music. Other than Aura there is no album that is well executed.
Also lay off of the Black Metal, you are gay at it.

19- Mägo de oz
I don't understand a word, you nationalistic pricks. Other than that, great band, great coversongs. (SSE)

18- Amon Amarth
They are a bunch of beerbellys and stupid noise when seen live, but other than that superb.

17- Horse the band
I had to befriend this band through constant listening. They appear crappy at first (well, at the first 20 playthroughs, actually), but they have great tunes and their songs have some serious power, if one doesn't run away screaming because they sound like fail and AIDS at first; with their awful singer and annoying clashy drums.

16- Virgin steele
Does this band even perform live? Only flaw I find in them is that I know them for such a long time and listened to them extremely before I came on this site, so I don't listen to them actively anymore- they have become somewhat shallow to me. (SSE)

15- Joy division
2-hit-wonder pre-emo-depressing-'can't-play-instruments'-Band. Its a shame that New Order had such a style change afterwards, but I couldn't care less- compared to the one hit New Order had, Joy Division is still special. (SSE)

14- Die toten hosen
Crap on a stick in general. (SSE all the way)

13- Orchestral manoeuvres in the dark
Phew, getting harder with finding flaws. They are still a great live-band- see them while they last!
If I were older I'd probably point out that they sold out after album #3, but I just rediscovered them and find everything from these folks fantastic.

12- Cradle of filth
Well, you know what there is to say about them, so I will spare you with my cryptic sentences. Basically Thornography & Damnation and a day are stinking piles of crap- the rest is likeable if you like them.

11- Deine lakaien
Mostly its the lack of another tour that bothers me. Some are saying that the early days of them were the best, but that is bullcrap. Anything pre-Dark Star

10- Die ärzte
They have some good songs, and I could name them…
.
.
.
So I will: Der Graf, Schopenhauer.
Now, that was over fast. So basically they are exactly like my #14, only slighly less. Senseless party-punk-crap FTL- Suck it up, Fangirls (SSE)

09- Aerosmith
Complete and utter (SSE). I can't recall any songs I like to listen to.

08- Manic street preachers
WTF happened to you guys? I know the untimely demise of Richey was hard but come on. This crap and shit and $§"§$""!"%&/$/%&($$"$/§/"$"§$"§$%%"§$"&§%/"§%!&$(§"§%"$ since he left is unbelievable. You all died with him after the first 3 albums. Fuck you, personally.
Also, I can't understand the effing lyrics even while holding the booklet, but that's cool, since it's part of the style.

07- Schandmaul
Sellouts, unimaginative, uncreative after Narrenkönig. Their pseudo-medieval language (which is not at all medieval, but incorrect grammar) is by no means cool, it just sounds retarded at the later albums. Still the best the late Folk revival has to offer. Nuff said.

06- Therion
I don't think they'll make a better album than Secret of the runes. The Black Metal origins of them were complete crap- as are their vocals other than the choir. Also WTF happened to the choir you drove around at concerts? Nowadays the singing is done by 4 crappy poser-solists.

05- Pearl jam
What are you looking for here? They are great- now buy their albums!

04- Kaizers orchestra
They had their peak, now they will fall (No, not in general, just for me. I had a phase were I listened to them constantly for days).

03- Machinae supremacy
See 04.

02- The cure
Every song of those So-heavily-overrated-that-they-are-stuck-up-in-their-own-arses-musicians is a remake from one of the three songtypes they have, which are: happily-depressed, depressed, and batshit-insane. They have no new material, every new album feels like a patch of the former.
Also regarding their intention, they should be called 'The Disease', if you know what I mean-

01- Project pitchfork
Oh, how I hate this singing pile of vomit. Whenever this failure at musical talent is trying to sing English in a CLEAR voice (without the artistiqué techno voice makeovers), it is only embarassing. A 5th-grader has a less brain-damaging accent than him.